Wednesday, 16 November 2011
EGGS, AVOCADOS AND RAINDROPS
I’ve sorted through the past few days, trying to find something good to tell you.
I found this: Waking up at 4:40 a.m. on a rainy night and on the windows are a dazzle of raindrops.
The patter of rain.
At 4:40 a.m., it doesn’t matter that my life is a shed skin.
At 4:40 a.m., I don’t have to ask, “What next?” or “How do I get through this?”
Another good thing: 3 days past steroids and I’m no longer suicidal or homicidal – or a little of both at once. I’m nearly ready to send letters of apology to those poor folks I wrote while in the grips of Decadron psychosis.
And how about this? Breakfast: 2 hard-boiled eggs, mashed avocado, and a slice of whole wheat toast. Eaten and, so far, digested without undue difficulty.
Doesn’t sound like much? Believe me, that’s practically a miracle at Lourdes.
And a brave effort this morning. A shower, a little makeup, the brown wig. I can almost stand to look in the mirror, almost believe that this will be over some day.
The pity-party is diminishing too.
Who knows, maybe even a walk at the Frog Pond Trail. Some long overdue thank you notes.
Love to all...